I hadn’t fed my Starbucks fix in a while, so I decided I’d take a chance and run over there before a call that started in 15 minutes. I was a bit concerned about being late for the call, but all I had to do was run to the building next store. Why not live on the edge? (Yes, this is lame, but this is my version of living on the edge.)
So, off I went. About 100 feet from the door to Starbucks, a very tall guy came from a side path and walked right in front of me. He didn’t really cut me off, but it was close enough that I was a bit miffed. And of course, he was going to Starbucks. Didn’t he know I was in a hurry?
When we reached the door, he did something unexpected. He opened the door for me and stood to the side. I grew up in Atlanta, where this happened all the time. In northern California… not so much. I thanked him, then went into the spaz routine that I go through when someone opens the door for me at Starbucks. Do I go ahead of him in line, or do I let him go first? My logic is that he was there first, and if he hadn’t been polite, he would have been first in line. (Yes, this is also lame, but welcome to my mind.) Plus, being behind me at Starbucks is probably very annoying – I’m one of those people whose coffee order goes on for days and includes way too many adjectives.
Anyway, I offered to let him go first. He declined. As we approached the registers, this gentleman said the most interesting thing:
You know, there really is no first.
I was still in my spaz mode, so I said something stupid and incoherent. Then we went our separate ways.
A few minutes later, I realized how profound that statement was. I have no idea what he actually meant by it, but on so many levels, he is right.
What does being “first” really mean?
Is it even possible to be first?
Why do we all want to be first?
I don’t really have answers to these questions, but I do know that when I gave up wanting to be first, I felt better. A lot better. I started smiling more.
What do you think? How does it feel if you give up wanting to be first?
That is an awfully deep thought for the coffee line! I love it. It can be a huge release to give up needing to be first. There are probably a lot of reasons we are always trying to be first, but part of it seems to me to be the hurry, hurry, hurry of our lives. Letting go of always needing to be in a hurry can be such a release – of tension, of pressure. Not to mention feeling better about not having to be in front of others, but getting comfortable being behind. Funny how a simple trip for coffee can be so revealing.